Oh GOD. I don’t want to grade the citations.

I feel like I don’t belong in the SSKAL. I don’t think I’ll do it again next year. I feel like an interloper. On the other hand, I feel right at home in each of the Great Northern KALs. Although I’m reasonably certain a couple of people might not like me very much.

All of this is doing absolutely nothing for my insecurities these days.

You know what’s the *best*? You get your period and then it’s over and you’re all “Woohoo! Short period!” But oh no, really it was just on a two day hiatus and now it’s all “BOOM! I’m back, baby! What? Oh, you don’t have a tampon handy? Gosh, so sorry. Heh. How awkward. Whelp. Guess I’ll just let you figure that one out. Heh. Heh.” Yeah. That’s just the *best*.

This video makes me hate my hair so much. Also they could have given that guy a WAY better hair cut. All they did was chop off the mullet tail.

I’M CLEARLY HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL HAIR CRISIS!!!

I’m sorry, but what the actual hell is going on with the footwear in this spread? Burn it all and let’s forget this ever happened.

I wonder if those things are insured. You know, beyond “The taxpayers will build us another one!”
Please. The Mister has been calling Trump Kaufman since the beginning.

I am sad that I lost my rock. I liked that rock.

I’ve always wanted a pair of 20 eyed Docs. Like since I was 16. Someday. I’ll be 90 years old, lacing up my Docs to go to my grandchildren’s house for some holiday dinner. And they’ll be all “There’s our granny. She’s still so feisty!” And I hope they call me granny. Cos that’s kind of awesome. That’s me. A feisty granny in 20 eyed Docs. Word.

I’m totally proud of you, Ali. You rock.

Cut. Color. Cut. Color. Cut. Color. Cut.

We need to do 4 people doing stuff. On account of those were fun. And also there are 4 of us now.

“They can’t lick our Dick!”

No, really. Can I just be paid to knit all day? Barring that, can I just be paid to research political theory and write about it all day?

What is this I can’t even

I don’t know. It’s supposed to rain. But I really want to walk over to Hot Slice for lunch. The half mile walk mitigates at least SOME of the calories a giganomous piece of pizza entails.

Story of my life, my friend.

Um. That really required a thank you. WTF is your problem.

Thanks for filling my inbox with requests to confirm crap I’ve already confirmed for you.

I need toner. Toner, damn you!

I enjoyed Stranger Things. I did not think it was as brilliant as apparently everyone else did. Of course, I’m not a Stephen King fan at all.

wanted to be sure i know

Been stuck in my head all damn day.

For a second I thought I had email from Richard Nixon and wondered how the GOP had managed to pull that one off, and really why Nixon instead of, say, Reagan? Then I remembered all the dead Democrats that have been voting and it seemed much less important. Of course, it was not an email from Richard Nixon.

I dunno. An awful lot hinges on this. This better go the way we’re hoping it goes.

Hey Lion Brand? For the elventieth time? I don’t crochet. Stop sending me crochet emails all the damn time.

I don’t know how you can be a coffee shop and not have any bloody half and half. No, I do not want 2% in my iced coffee, thank you. Do I look like a crazy person?

OK, yeah, maybe.

I am not a fan of audio books. They make me fall asleep. Or, if I manage to stay awake, I find that at some point I’ve stopped listening and suddenly realize I have absolutely no idea what the hell is going on. But the snippets I’m hearing of Norm MacDonald reading his autobiography or memoir or exaggerated tale of his existence, are pretty hilarious.

Alright. Enough. Maybe I should have some tea.

No, no, no. It’s always first, middle, last. Never just first and last.

Might as well just